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| Source: Hamburger Abendblatt |
Most people talk about the long climb towards that closet office on top of a lanky skyscraper in the middle of some modern city – the exams, interviews, internships, study abroad programs, networking, and finally, the job offer. But what next?
Let's assume that you know when you've bumped into a successful job and you aren't one of those fanatics constantly striving to be better than everyone else. You have your cozy office, a friendly staff, exciting work (although long hours), but why the uneasiness? You take a look at everyone around you: your mentor has a beautiful family; your best work colleague is complaining about the lack of sleep due to a crying newborn baby; and your old study mate recently sent you a wedding invitation in the mail. Sure, you're happy for everyone else. But you can't stop thinking, is this my future?
There are many people who feel that every life decision must be planned. As soon as men land a job, they talk about their future as a bachelor with a nice car, an apartment with a sky view and plenty of women in the little black book. Meanwhile, women suddenly want to have their husband and three kids within the next five years.
For the planners nodding their heads in affirmation: why the rush? Have you ever had a conversation with a new father? If you ignore the bags sitting comfortably under his eyes along with his breakfast of stale cookies that he found in some conference room, then the conversation is just bearable. As for the successful bachelor – things start to deflate when all of your buddies are in a relationship.
Back to the main issue: a successful career does not have to be the end. There are some people that seem to always enjoy life. They have the same workload as you but life seems lighter and a tick easier. If you ever had a talk with these people, you would realize that they are in no hurry. They travel. They plan dinner parties with friends. They play sports. They go to concerts. They are spontaneous. Some of these people choose to have families and others don’t. But their lives continue to be open books. When they talk about their kids, they can’t stop smiling. Others can’t stop talking about their recent trip to Sri Lanka and their upcoming weekend trip with friends to the beach. The big difference between these people and everyone else is that they are living.
Even if you can’t tackle that concept of life, then don’t lose the second lesson: follow your gut. Don't waste your time comparing yourself to others. Do good work. Always do your best. But focus on you. If work isn’t fun anymore, then find something else. These words seem paper thin but they are solid granite. If your office seems a little too cramped and exhausting, you can find your dream job if you don’t settle. All of my friends have made it back on their feet even when they barely believed it themselves. Life tends to reward those who try. For those having the same issues in their private life, don’t try to pry yourself away from your gut feeling. If your partner wants to settle down and you aren’t ready, then don’t do it. In the long run, this may save you from a very lengthy divorce. Add kids into the equation and you are floating on an endless pile of complications.
Lesson three: explore the world. Every person that has captured my attention has travelled abroad many times. Naturally, people can explore the world in their backyard but exploring another place, culture and language is exhilarating. Getting lost in a land where you can barely pronounce the street names is downright hilarious (in hindsight). Travelling keeps things exciting. If things start to get too comfortable at home, then they also tend to get boring. That mixed together with a lengthy work routine is a great start towards a midlife crisis.
The final lesson: don't ever think that you're too old. The only difference between you and an 80-year old person (aside from health) is experience. If you spend each evening watching television, then the 80-year old person that I know can run circles around you in terms of having fun. Live a little; be curious; and have fun.
-To all the people that are having fun, Dried Tomatoes salutes you!
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